In a world where everywhere you turn you must "see" the hashtag #couplegoals, it seems like it is much more valuable to do life - whatever it is, with someone else. When you are in a relationship, you mostly automatically have a partner for all your favorite activities - a movie, hiking, dinner, playing video games, vacationing etc,. You also by default and love, have to pick up new hobbies, and enjoy them with the person.
While it is absolutely beautiful to do things with someone else, there is also that thing about enjoying life by yourself, independently and beautifully alone. The question today is where do we draw the line?
I have found that I am way better when I do things alone - studying, a pet project, learning or developing a hobby, etc. Even at a new job, I have to learn things on my own instead of being spoon fed. For me, finding your own way is the point. Sometimes, being alone in a space with no one particularly known makes me so much more productive. Is that weird?
So yes, I would go to the movies alone, sign up for an activity alone and so on. While I enjoy spending time with my friends and family, sometimes, it is better alone. Yes, I plan it in my head, share it, and then kindly decline any sort of offer for others to hop in - I am not always successful 'cos stubborn friends lol. Maybe being an only child, and growing up as one contributes to this? I am not sure I know how to be any other way.
Also, I have been single for a minute and in this period, I am learning a lot about myself. I am finding that comfort and confidence in who I am and just owning it. I did not realize how much I could appreciate who God has made me and I grateful for this gift.
Sometimes, I fear meeting the significant other. What if he just wants to scatter this sanity and space that has been created for me? What if he doesn't appreciate and understand the way I am crafted? When I say I need some time to recreate or to regain my energy, I fear that he will take it personal, and think it is because I do not love him enough. The reality is that I already have so much love in me for him and by God's grace, it won't run out. Will he understand the time requested is for my sanity?
So here I am, living a single person's dream and loving life. I am enjoying the journey and appreciating whatever life throws at me. But could I be too comfortable in my own space and unknowingly, looking the other way when there is a threat of someone scattering my sanity? Or maybe it is A-okay to have these fears, and to be careful when making such decisions? Where exactly do we draw the line?
Am I the only one who is like this? Are there other people out there like me? What do you think or what advice do you have? I would love to read your thoughts, opinion / & advice. Please leave your comments.
Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed this post, and will be returning for more from Abi :)