About Me

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Calgary, Alberta, Canada
I am a lot of things - I am limited edition, not weird :) . A Christ Lover and a fashion lover. I love crime and comedy shows (or movies) .. and I always move on no matter what :)

Friday, October 14, 2011

What's the media doing to YOU?

how is everyone doing?  I have been soo busy since school started, that's why I have been  MIA

Anyways, this morning, one of my friends posted something on facebook posted below 


I wouldn't lie that the media hasn't affected me one way or the other. it's one of the reasons why I check up on my make-up and hair like every 3 hours or why even though am skinny, I worry that am getting fat or my bum is growing too big. It's one of the reasons why as a girl, your parents won't trust you, or believe you why they believe you are definitely doing wrong and why your brothers can do what they like. It's why some boys walk up to you and say crap... why they get soo rude the first time they meet you.

It's the reason why many girls believe sexy= slutty ... that they have to show ALL the skin to get attention. It works sometimes cuz media has shaped both the female and male brains to this. It's why sex sells soo soo fast! and  why every 3rd person on my twitter account tweets sex like all the time. It's why people believe that to keep their relationships, they have to have sex and soon too... look at those movies. they make u believe that if a man isn't trying to sleep with you after the first 3 dates, he is prolly gay or not interested. It's why people still believe men are smarter, more in control and women are softer and too emotional. it's why some random 17 year old will say "oh, yeah, women prefer to driven around they don't wanna drive".... 

The list goes on.  

well... the media affects us in a lot of ways especially a technology crazy generation like ours. God did not create women to be slaves or subordinates, he did to complete men... without a woman there can NEVER be a man. it's the truth. God created women to help, to fill in all the spaces the man can't, to be the manager, to multi-task, to complete not to be a slave. the media mostly says the woman is there for sex and to look good. That wasn't God's idea and I definitely don't support the "background" image.

 Let's try to filter what we take in, control what we watch, see and listen to.. the media has a lot of good but  be careful not to be blind to the negative effects. it has shaped our generation's thinking process to a particular direction that might affect us greatly in future

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

What did I get myself into?

"look at him, all fat and annoying" arrgh! how did I get myself into this? how did I end up with him? okay, he isn't fat or anything.. he just lost the spark, I don't know why I get irritated by him. Last night he came home with a new necklace for me hoping it would make me smile. Argh! NO! It's really not about gifts or money... It's something more....

You will call me selfish but yes, maybe I am... I really don't know why I am angry. He tries to make it work, he does everything he could but he is missing the point; the whole point.

I can't leave him, am in love with him, I absolutely am... He just irritates me these days, he got too careless, too confident... because he knows I won't leave. I remember when we met, before we got married about 5 years ago. We always had those movie nights, and we would go dancing once in two weeks. And we surprised each other all the time. It was like my fairy tale. Our fairy tale He had a drive wanted to be on top of things without controlling me, very understanding, and treated me like an egg even when his friends were there. I felt like a princess.. That's who I feel in love with, that's why I ended up with him.

I don't know what happened, he changed.. okay, not completed, but I miss the man I fell for. Now, he wants me to do things his own way, he thinks he knows better. I never signed up for this. I know he will never hit me or make me forcefully do anything that will harm me or that won't make me happy. But I just want to make my own decisions and think things through before he chips in his opinions. Okay, I would give credit to him tho, he is usually right and that makes me jealous. yes, am selfish.

and now, he has his friends come over eat my darn food and leave our darn house untidy..... he used to prevent them from messing up the house.. he knows how I get with these things... me and untidy don't stay in the same room... they get soo noisy and even tho he knows am studying for my exam in my last year in med school he doesn't consider it..

He used to dress-up for me... okay not DRESS-UP .... but look good, take his time to wear that nicely tailored shirt when we went out as a couple... that's all gone now (n) he seems too busy for me...

all of our special nights of treats are gone... he seems to busy for me... he seems tooo busy planning  both our lives instead of allowing us plan it... last week, he talked about us trying for a baby and ofcos am not ready. I don't think we have the resources to take good care of a child yet.. Like, my kids have to get the best of everything... paying student loans, and just starting our careers.. how can we afford it?

I love my baby... see, I can't help but call him baby... I know he does too and I know if we came back in our next lives, I would pick him over and over again... I just miss him... I just want him to realize that we need that spark again... Marriage doesn't have to be boring, I don't want to grow old too young... How can I make him see this?


Tuesday, October 11, 2011

I want to

Soak myself in a hot tub, 1 hour or more drinking cocktails and strawberries..... drinking my stress away

Get myself all the things I don't deserve (diamonds, stocks, dresses, shoes, stocks) everything 

I want a treat at the spa.... my muscles feeling relaxed....

I want to get that job I don't qualify for, get those marks I hardly earned (which is hardly true) I work for every darn mark/cent and more

I want to travel away.. somewhere with warmth and fresh air with laughter and love all around

For people to understand me... okay, not really... I careless

I just want to be ontop, want my hard work to earn me something valuable.... I want to be glad I tried not regret I did in the first place.. 

I want to be stress free ......  just want all these stress out