About Me

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Calgary, Alberta, Canada
I am a lot of things - I am limited edition, not weird :) . A Christ Lover and a fashion lover. I love crime and comedy shows (or movies) .. and I always move on no matter what :)

Saturday, May 21, 2011

na me dull pass!

soo hmm.... I met this guy somewhere one time; when he tried to have a simple convo with me but (with people who know me well) I was all over the place, din't really care at that moment and wasn't in that "convo" mood. Anyways, I went out one weekend and lo and behold! I saw him there looking FINE as Trey Songz (lol, okay; am exaggerating too much-- he is just there). He looked same as the first time except this time, I was in the mood to have a decent convo.

Anyways, I was with my bestie all night and his table was to the far right of ours; she told me he was stealing glances at me from time to time; I was too (hoping that he won't catch me lol) but our eyes met once or twice lol..... My friend kept telling me to go say hi but honestly, I was shy and just slow lol. I was shy, I was like errr and say what? so that when I go "have met u before" he goes "Okay" and all we will both hear are cricket noises?? NO THANKS! loool I din't want him to start thinking I was errr I dunno the word  and I dunno; I don't know the last time I was all "errr...." short of words

hmm... as I was dulling, this girl I know (who has/had no idea about my prey (lol) ) went up to him; they danced and I saw them talking (lool; I wasn't looking :|  ) .. and he asked for her number....


So yes! na me dull pass! I feel somehow; I still don't know the right word for the "somehow" and slow is definitely in the definition ....

Now I should insert that "Should've kissed you" video by Chris Brown... I will just change the kissed to "said hi to" am pained sha and I caused it...  Feels like I took my heart and broke it lol (okay, it isn't that serious) but am pained sha




Okbye....

Backgrounds

I have been really happy these days and I really don't know why....  and I need a theme song for this feeling soo if you have suggestions please let me know :D....

So backgrounds; hmmm I grew up in an average middle class Nigerian family. But I have been blessed. My parents always provide all I need and almost all I want. So I can say am spoiled (a little bit).. I won't say I have really experienced "wanting" (except for situations when I decide not to let them know-- like suffering in silence). But then again I am blessed because I know sometimes; even when things are hard, they will still go out of their way to make sure am happy and I don't feel out of place in the midst of my friends or mates: hence, the reason am not a demanding person; I think instead of taking advantage of the situation; it disciplined me.

I went to an all girls' day and boarding school; where girls made other girls feel out of place. I don't know where we all got our mentality from; that one that says: "pple who are not as wealthy can't be healthy with me" but we all lived in that light. Maybe not completely but one way or the other we did.  I watched my mates lie about what they did not have just to feel like part of the crowd, and I heard of some who cried their lungs out so they could take expensive and fantasy things to school. Back then, I laughed at all these people and thought they were stupid. I also watched the privileged look down and make some other girls feel like rats.   

But really, I don't think this will ever end; in high school, students will always make other students feel "uncool" some will do silly things to be "cool." see, we were all really young and naive maybe silly too ... But now, most of us are in university, and some are done... and the thing is; these "levels" thing has not ended.. it's like the older some people get the stronger the attitude gets. like WOW! talk about "growing up"

So it's not like before coming into this world we made some sort of arrangement with God like:  "Yo! Lord, I want to be born in that poor home" or "God, you know how we do! that multi-billionaire gotta be my dad"
like seriously, do we??

We all know that anyone's status can change in a twinkle of an eye.. like the saying goes "no-one knows tomorrow" Why make others feel less? why terrorize others because you are blessed with wealth... One thing is God blesses people to be a blessing not to be terror ... and he can decide to take it all away and give it to someone who will manage it better.

We should all be careful tho.. money isn't everything: and that you have it today doesn't mean you will tomorrow. That you are up there today doesn't mean you won't need those under you someday.


With LOVE,
Abi Tobi
xx


BTW, am a big fan of Chris Brown .. listen to the song below : D

Monday, May 16, 2011

Fear

"am in my fourth year and you expect me to start again?? my mother wants me to be a Neodoctorismist and even if I hate every bit of my classes I would stick with it... by the way I really love the business world" translation: I might end up prescribing the wrong medication and killing lives I don't mind; so far I live my mother's dream... My kids can live mine....

"I can't leave my job, really, I can't; no other person will hire me, where do I start from? I hate it but at least it puts food on the table" translation: I am ready to be miserable for the rest of my life and I don't mind going to work angry and unfulfilled everyday.. it's the things in life to be unfulfilled.

"We have been together for 5 years now; and you expect that I don't marry her??? I know she's disrespectful, and I can't stand her one bit, and God knows it's not love I feel for her........ bu..butt what will people say?? am a Christian man!!  translation: If people think I am okay, then I am okay... am ready to cheat once the right girl comes my way and I am also ready to have a heart attack at 30 before I meet my first child ....

"Oh he loves me! I know he cheats, he even flaunts it at my face, but he loves me.. he disrespects me but he loves me, you know he has anger issues, that's why he hits me, but he loves me.... no one will love me better... am 26years old, and not very attractive; who do u expect to love me?" translation:  it's okay if he screws me over and destroys me completely.. I don't mind soo faar it's him doing it....

Fear is what makes us hold on a little too long to anything. The number 1 reason why people screw up their own lives.

It is funny how people keep holding on to that one thing that will completely destroy them; giving excuses, afraid of what will happen if they walk away. I know that whatever it is you are running away from is better than the danger you are heading towards. Life is all about risk and making wise choices; you won't make the move that you know will make you lose all of your money at the casino; why do that with your life??

Why won't we go into that career we enjoy learning; that every time we are in class we are eager to learn.

Why won't we stick with the person that makes our hearts "pom pom dara shuku pam pam" and know it's same with them... why should we keep sticking with someone who doesn't mind hurting us (anyone who loves you doesn't hurt you intentionally)

Why hold on to that one thing that will destroy you; that will make you look back 10-15 years from now and say "I wish I had"  with tears in your heart??

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Such Is Life

Eyes shot
Memory travels; back in time

Some hearts were broken
Caused some pains
Said some words that pierce like an arrow
Some decisions need(ed) a time machine to repair
(still waiting)

Unfriendly friends,
Best of friends
Malice with family
Laughter with loved ones

Soar relationships
Tears Cried
Heart beating; a little faster
It's love? No, it's just that nameless feeling.

Good grades, bad grades
Disappointments and heart breaks
Hardly working, working hard
Project due, got that raise
Declined or successful
Gets up and moves on

Loud music
Drunk or not; dancing like it's the last one
Laughing out loud. Having a good time

Same mistake made
Lesson learned
No regrets
Just lessons
Wiser; Life is a gift

Things happen
Such is life,
It moves on
So do I